Are you a ‘living room family’? Explaining what the TikTok trend debate actually means

The article explores the emerging TikTok trend categorizing families into 'living room families' and 'bedroom families,' examining the definitions, implications, and emotional responses associated with each type. A 'living room family' is characterized by members frequently gathering in a common area, such as a family room or basement, often around a shared television. Conversely, a 'bedroom family' is described as one where individuals spend most of their time in separate rooms, typically their bedrooms or offices, often with personal entertainment devices. The author's own household, with younger children playing in common areas and older children retreating to their rooms, is presented as a mixed example. Several TikTok creators share personal anecdotes highlighting the impact of their upbringing within these family structures. One mother, @lacroix_goth, recounts a feeling of isolation in a 'bedroom family' where she felt compelled to be self-reliant. Another creator, @5unnyday55, suggests that 'bedroom families' can be identified by the absence of toys in common areas, advocating for prioritizing children's comfort and feeling of welcome over a pristine home. A particularly emotional account from @enigmatic_actuality7 details a childhood spent confined to her room, contrasting it with her current joy in seeing her son freely occupy the family room, emphasizing that the 'mess can be cleaned up' but a sense of belonging is paramount. These online discussions reveal that the 'living room family' concept offers validation and a sense of healing for many adults who experienced a 'bedroom family' upbringing. The trend encourages embracing the natural messiness and comfort of shared family spaces. The author reflects on this, seeing the clutter from her younger children's play in a new, positive light, especially as her older children transition into their teen years and naturally seek more privacy in their rooms. The article acknowledges that family dynamics are diverse and that the concept of 'family time' can manifest in various ways, influenced by factors like parental work schedules, children's activities, and individual needs. While gathering in a common space is valued, the article cautions against rigid interpretations, recognizing the importance of personal space for decompression for both parents and children. Ultimately, it suggests that success in family interaction looks different across families and stages of life. The core message underscores the long-term value of fostering a sense of security and belonging in children through shared moments, even if messy, before the inevitable quietness of an 'empty nest.' #FamilyDynamics #ParentingStyles #SocialMediaTrends #ChildDevelopment #FamilyLife #TikTokTrends #ParentingAdvice

The article discusses the recent viral trend of "living room kids," a term that originated on TikTok to describe children who prefer to spend their time in communal family spaces, such as the living room or kitchen, rather than isolating themselves in their bedrooms. A millennial, identified as @bookishandbrewsy on Threads, shared their realization about this concept, expressing that despite common perceptions about millennials, their children "are doing alright." This sentiment resonated with many, as the post garnered over 8,500 likes and nearly 400 comments. Clinical psychologist Dr. Martha Deiros Collado provided insights into the phenomenon, explaining that being a "living room child" extends beyond mere physical presence in shared areas. It also encompasses the family's acceptance and integration of children's play, toys, and personal items into these common spaces. Collado suggests that this approach sends a powerful message to children: that their presence is valued and that they are allowed to occupy as much space as adults do within the home. This inclusive environment is seen as beneficial for children's development, fostering a sense of being seen, heard, and valued. For many parents, particularly millennials, this concept has led to a shift in perspective. Jess Darrington, a mother of two from Idaho, shared her experience, initially finding her children's constant presence in shared spaces exhausting. However, after encountering the "living room families" trend on TikTok, she realized she had been viewing her situation negatively. Darrington subsequently posted a video of her children playing in the living room, captioning it, "It's worth the mess," highlighting her changed outlook. This trend also signifies a departure from the upbringing of many millennials, who often experienced childhoods where they were expected to be quiet in communal areas and keep their belongings confined to their bedrooms. Collado notes that parents today may be consciously choosing to offer their children a different message, one that emphasizes their right to take up space and feel a sense of belonging in their home, rather than feeling excluded or pressured to act like miniature adults. Comments on @bookishandbrewsy's Threads post further supported this idea. One user remarked on their own children's constant presence in the living room, responding to a visitor's observation with "Well, it's their home." Another commenter reflected on their childhood, where the living room was a "mom's pretty room" where they were restricted from playing. They contrasted this with their own child's freedom to play in the living room, realizing the positive implications of such an environment. A third user succinctly stated that "Millennials raising living room kids is healing the world a little at a time," underscoring the perceived emotional benefits of this parenting style. Although formal research on the long-term effects of this parenting approach is still limited, psychologists believe that being included in all areas of the home can profoundly impact a child's sense of self-worth. Children raised in such environments are likely to develop a stronger sense of being seen, heard, and valued. However, the article also acknowledges that children's needs evolve as they grow, and older children may naturally seek more privacy and personal space. Ultimately, Collado emphasizes that the core principle is about parents allowing their children to feel understood and that their thoughts, feelings, and interests are important, fostering a sense of acceptance and understanding. #Millennials #Parenting #Children #FamilyLife #ChildDevelopment #Psychology #SocialMediaTrends #TikTok

A new parenting trend, termed “living room children,” is gaining traction on TikTok, describing children who prefer to spend their time in communal household spaces rather than in their own rooms. This concept, as explained by clinical psychologist Dr. Martha Deiros Collado, extends beyond physical presence to encompass how families integrate children’s activities and belongings into shared living areas. It signifies a departure from traditional expectations where children were often confined to their rooms or expected to remain out of sight in adult spaces. Jess Darrington, a mother from Idaho, discovered the term on TikTok after she and her husband found themselves constantly with their children in shared areas. Initially, they viewed this as a challenge to their personal time, but after learning about the “living room child” concept, Darrington realized she was looking at the situation from the wrong perspective. She now embraces her children's presence throughout the home, even if it leads to more clutter, emphasizing that “it's worth the mess.” Her video sharing this realization resonated with many other mothers on TikTok, contributing to the popularity of the hashtag “livingroomfamily,” which promotes the idea of making children feel comfortable, valued, and included in all parts of the home. Dr. Deiros Collado highlights the profound psychological benefits for children raised in this environment. She suggests that “living room children” are likely to feel more accepted and welcome in all areas of their home, blurring the lines between adult and child spaces. This approach sends a powerful message that children are not merely “mini-adults” but full members of the household whose presence and needs are acknowledged and accommodated. This is seen as a progressive shift in parenting, particularly among parents who may have experienced a more restrictive upbringing themselves, where their personal space was limited or their presence in communal areas was discouraged. These parents often seek to provide a different experience for their own children, one that fosters a sense of belonging and agency within the family unit. While the concept is relatively new and lacks extensive developmental research, the psychological implications are significant. Allowing children to occupy communal spaces freely communicates that their thoughts, feelings, and interests are valued. This inclusive parenting style is particularly beneficial for younger children, fostering a strong sense of acceptance and security. However, Dr. Deiros Collado also notes that as children mature, their need for private spaces will naturally increase, and parenting styles should adapt accordingly. Ultimately, this trend reflects a broader movement towards more inclusive and child-centric family dynamics, where the home is seen as a shared environment for all its inhabitants. #Family #Parenting #ChildPsychology #Trending #Children #TikTok #FamilyLife #ChildDevelopment

TikTok creator Marissa Kile initiated a discussion about an often-unspoken aspect of parenting: whether parents predominantly spend their free time in the bedroom or the living room. Kile, identifying as a "living room parent," shared her upbringing with "bedroom parents" who primarily retreated to their room for relaxation, making their personal space feel sacred and often inaccessible to their children. She expressed a desire for her parents to have been more present in shared living spaces during her childhood, leading her to adopt a different approach with her own children. Kile elaborated in a follow-up video, distinguishing between historical and contemporary "bedroom parents." She suggested that her own parents, who were "bedroom parents," actively sought to distance themselves from their children, indicating a generational difference in parenting motivations. In contrast, modern "bedroom parents" might simply prefer the comfort of their personal space while still inviting their children to join them. Her video ignited a significant debate among parents on TikTok, prompting many to reflect on their own parenting styles and their implications for family dynamics. Commenters largely identified with either the "bedroom parent" or "living room parent" label, illustrating how deeply ingrained these preferences are. Some parents who identified as "bedroom parents" expressed concerns about whether this style conveyed a lack of desire to spend time with their children, while others defended it as a way to model independence or maintain a personal sanctuary. For instance, one user, Brookeebaby, emphasized the need for a private space to relax, while Paige, another user, acknowledged being a "bed person" but noted that she often invites her children to join her. The discussion highlighted a diverse range of motivations behind each parenting style. Some "bedroom parents" valued their personal space for quiet and solitude, sometimes even inviting their children to join them in their retreat. Other parents, identifying as "living room parents," prioritized being physically present in communal areas to foster family togetherness, often contrasting their approach with their own parents' habits. The debate also touched upon the idea of "couch people" versus "bed people," suggesting that personal comfort preferences also play a role in where parents choose to spend their downtime. Ultimately, Kile's video served as a valuable conversation starter, encouraging parents to consider the impact of their spatial habits on their family's health and happiness. The consensus from the online discussion indicated that neither approach is inherently right or wrong, but rather a reflection of individual parenting philosophies and needs for personal space versus shared family time. The discussion underlined the importance of self-awareness in parenting, prompting individuals to evaluate whether their choices align with their desired family environment and relationships. #ParentingStyles #FamilyDynamics #TikTokDebate #ParentalSpace #ChildhoodExperience #ModernParenting #GenerationalDifferences #HomeLife #ParentChildRelationship

The article discusses a new trend on social media, particularly TikTok and Instagram, that categorizes families into 'living room families' and 'bedroom families.' This trend, popularized by accounts like @mindfulmadga, suggests that families who spend most of their time in communal spaces like the living room are inherently more safe, accepted, and welcome, while those whose members frequently retreat to their bedrooms are implied to be less comfortable or secure within the family unit. The author, Samantha Darby, challenges this binary categorization, drawing on her own childhood experience of preferring her bedroom as a safe and happy space for play and reading. Darby argues against the notion that a child's preference for their bedroom indicates a lack of safety or acceptance within the home. She highlights that such labeling can induce unnecessary guilt in parents. The author emphasizes that a family's dynamics are influenced by various factors, including children's ages, parents' work schedules, extracurricular activities, and individual personalities. She provides examples from her own family life, noting that even in cozy moments, interactions in communal spaces often involve parental instructions or boundaries, which do not necessarily imply a lack of safety but rather the navigation of shared living. Furthermore, Darby asserts that a child's bedroom should be an extension of their safe home environment, a place for exploration, growth, and enjoyment. She cites a 2015 study indicating that children spend a significant portion of their lives in their homes, with approximately one-third of that time in their bedrooms, suggesting this is a natural and healthy part of childhood. The author questions whether forcing children into communal spaces when they prefer their rooms serves the child's needs or the parent's desire for a particular family image. She draws a parallel to adult experiences, asking how an adult would feel if their partner insisted on 'quality time' in the living room when they needed personal space. The article also critiques the broader social media trend of labeling parenting styles, such as 'helicopter moms,' 'gentle parenting,' or 'scrunchy moms.' Darby views these labels as playing on parental insecurities, offering a false sense of a definitive guidebook to parenting. She concludes that true family togetherness, safety, and a secure relationship between parents and children are complex and cannot be reduced to simplistic labels or dictated by which room family members occupy. Ultimately, the article advocates for parents to trust their instincts and meet their children's individual needs, recognizing that a loving and nurturing environment is far more intricate than social media trends suggest. #ParentingTrends #SocialMediaInfluence #FamilyDynamics #ChildDevelopment #ParentalGuilt #HomeEnvironment #MindfulLiving #BedroomVsLivingRoom

An interior designer named Shannyn Weiler sparked a debate on TikTok by asserting that an excessive display of family photos, termed a “shrine,” indicates poor taste in interior decor. Weiler’s argument centers on the idea that homes should not solely feature personal photographs but should incorporate a variety of art and design elements. She provided an anecdote from her own life, recalling how she and her husband, as young newlyweds with limited funds, filled their first apartment with wedding photos, creating what she now refers to as a "shrine." She extended this idea to parents with a single baby or grandparents with one grandchild, suggesting that such focused displays of one subject can dominate a living space. Weiler advocates for a more balanced approach to home decoration. She recommends integrating diverse artwork, including prints from sources like Etsy, and mirrors to create a varied visual environment. Her suggestion is to avoid having photographs of family members on every wall, emphasizing the importance of mixing different types of decor to prevent a "shrine-like" appearance. This perspective garnered significant attention and criticism from social media users. Many commenters expressed strong disagreement, emphasizing that their homes are primarily for their own comfort and enjoyment, not for impressing visitors. A popular sentiment was that displaying pictures of loved ones brings joy and personal connection to a home, making it feel lived-in and cherished. Some users highlighted that they prioritize photos of their children and family experiences over generic art or flowers. Commenters also pointed out that the idea of designing a home to avoid appearing "tacky" to others misses the fundamental purpose of a personal living space. They argued that individual preferences should dictate home decor, irrespective of external opinions on taste. Some shared personal experiences, like one individual who disliked growing up in a home that prioritized aesthetic over personal touches, feeling that their mother valued material things more than family memories. Conversely, a minority of respondents agreed with Weiler’s professional opinion. These individuals shared the view that too many personal photos can appear narcissistic or visually unappealing. They noted instances where homes filled exclusively with wedding photos, for example, suggested a lack of broader interests or a somewhat dated aesthetic. One commenter mentioned a friend’s home with an abundance of wedding pictures, which they found tacky, and ironically, those friends later divorced, reinforcing the idea that such displays might not reflect a well-rounded interior. Despite the backlash, Weiler's viewpoint is not unique within interior design circles. Sarah Han from Apartment Therapy echoes a similar sentiment, suggesting that an abundance of self-portraits in a home can be perceived as vain. Weiler posted a follow-up video acknowledging the varied reactions and explaining that while some design advice may initially seem unappealing, trying new ideas can sometimes lead to unexpected satisfaction. Her follow-up stressed that individuals may find some design principles resonate with them after experimenting, even if their initial reaction is resistance. #InteriorDesign #FamilyPhotos #HomeDecor #TikTokTrends #DesignPhilosophy #PersonalExpression #AestheticDebate

Leticia Colorado, a 33-year-old single mother residing in Pittsburg, California, shared her unconventional living arrangement in an as-told-to essay. She lives with her five children, aged 3, 4, 6, 11, and 17, in a one-bedroom apartment. Colorado notably gave up the sole bedroom to her 11-year-old daughter, Se'Lia, to ensure she had privacy and a personal space. This decision stemmed from their past experiences of living with a large family in a five-bedroom house and a period of homelessness, where they lacked their own dedicated space. Colorado prioritized Se'Lia's need for privacy for activities like homework, hosting friends, and displaying artwork, recognizing its importance for her daughter's individual expression and well-being. Colorado gained significant attention in November after posting a TikTok video detailing her family's living situation, which garnered over 11 million views. Before this viral post, she admitted to feeling embarrassed about her apartment and hesitated to invite people over. Her decision to share her story publicly was encouraged by a friend. She also posted an earlier video about being unable to renew her Costco membership due to financial constraints, which helped her build confidence in sharing her struggles. Colorado found that much of the online content she encountered depicted an idealized lifestyle of wealth and comfort, which often made her feel more disheartened. She aimed to counteract this narrative by showing the reality of many struggling families. Colorado works as a Lyft and DoorDash driver, a schedule that accommodates her need to transport her children to and from school, making traditional work hours impractical. Through her viral video, she intended to empower other single mothers, emphasizing that if their children are happy and healthy in an affordable living situation, they should not feel inferior or ashamed. She stressed the importance of living life without concern for others' opinions, especially those who do not contribute to her financial responsibilities. Her message resonated with many, leading to a largely supportive response. The moment Colorado informed Se'Lia that the bedroom would be hers was deeply emotional and gratifying for both of them, marking a significant milestone in providing her daughter with a sense of ownership and personal space. While Se'Lia primarily uses the room, it is technically shared with her 17-year-old son, who visits on weekends, utilizing a trundle bed. All family members share the closet. Colorado, along with her three youngest children, sleeps in the living room. Despite the close quarters, her children enjoy their home, affectionately calling it "the White House" due to the building's exterior. Colorado maintains a minimalist approach to furnishings to maximize play space, allowing her children to ride scooters indoors and have ample room for their toys. Despite the overwhelming positive support and shared experiences from mothers globally, including from Uganda, Italy, Spain, and India, Colorado also faced negative comments. Some viewers criticized her living situation, suggested calling Child Protective Services, or made derogatory remarks about her family size and use of birth control. However, the volume of encouraging messages and shared stories from others in similar economic circumstances outweighed the negativity. Colorado noted that the widespread support indicates that many individuals live in comparable situations due to economic hardship and high costs of living, yet few feel comfortable disclosing their realities publicly. #SingleMother #FamilyLife #OneBedroomApartment #ParentingChallenges #SocialMediaImpact #TikTokViral #EconomicStruggle #AffordableHousing

The article delves into the contentious topic of 'The Big Light' in cohabitating adult households, examining the varying perspectives on overhead lighting in home aesthetics and functionality. The author introduces this widespread debate through a personal anecdote, detailing his fiancée's strong aversion to the stark overhead light in their apartment's foyer, which she insists must remain off. This personal experience serves as a microcosm for a broader online phenomenon, where aesthetes and interior design enthusiasts on platforms like TikTok have coined the term 'The Big Light' to refer to typically utilitarian, bright overhead fixtures. These fixtures are often seen as antithetical to creating a 'cozy' or 'euphoric dimness' in a domestic space, a sentiment popularized by a viral TikTok video in 2022. The piece highlights how this debate has permeated home-decor discussions in publications like Apartment Therapy and Homes & Gardens, indicating a shared understanding among many about the impact of lighting on mood and environment. Emily Johnson, a professional in food media, shares her conversion from a proponent of overhead lights to an avid detractor, influenced by an interior designer friend. She now finds that bright overhead lighting detracts from meaningful conversation and intentionality, going so far as to cover her light switch with a framed painting to ensure perpetual dimness. Camilla Mikolajewska, a curator from Chicago, further reinforces this perspective, arguing that 'The Big Light' should be reserved exclusively for tasks such as cleaning or cooking. She suggests that constant exposure to bright, white light can lead to discomfort, migraines, and overstimulation, preferring a less illuminated environment for general living. Scientific research supports these anecdotal claims, with studies from the University of North Carolina indicating that cold, bright lighting enhances alertness and productivity, while warmer, low-color light temperatures, like candlelight, foster relaxation and creative thinking. This is attributed to the effect of bright light on melatonin suppression, a hormone crucial for regulating circadian rhythms, similar to the impact of blue light from phone screens. Mikolajewska also points out a psychological aspect: harsh lighting can unflatteringly expose imperfections in a home, such as dust or grease, leading to a subconscious accumulation of chores and intrusive thoughts. Softer lamplight, conversely, offers a more forgiving and less demanding visual experience. Leah Alexander, an interior designer in Atlanta, echoes this, comparing overly bright, concentrated light sources to 'interrogation lamps' that fail to 'soften imperfections, in the space or its inhabitants.' However, Alexander also offers a more nuanced view, distinguishing between 'The Big Light' and effective overhead lighting. She suggests that small recessed lights and dimmer switches on all fixtures can provide flexible lighting options, allowing residents to adjust the ambiance without resorting to complete darkness or the clutter of numerous lamps. The article acknowledges the practical challenges of installing such systems, explaining why some might opt for simpler solutions like covering light switches. The author concludes by confessing his own indifference to 'The Big Light,' admitting he rarely notices its presence or absence, much to his fiancée's dismay. He introduces Aahli Makhani, a logistics analyst who champions bright white light, finding warm tones 'stuffy' and sparking arguments with friends and family over his preference. Makhani humorously suggests that the relentless pursuit of optimizing personal comfort, including lighting, can paradoxically lead to a constant awareness of other imperfections. The author muses on the possibility of a future conversion, likening it to a journey into the world of sophisticated interior design, where he might finally 'see the light' in a new, dimmer way. #HomeLighting #InteriorDesign #HomeDecor #LightingPreferences #CohabitationConflicts #PsychologyOfLight #HomeAesthetics #TikTokTrends #DomesticLife

Shannyn Weiler, a Utah-based interior designer, recently shared her opinions on displaying family photos in homes, sparking a lively debate online. While acknowledging that there's nothing inherently wrong with family pictures, Weiler suggests that an excessive display can transform a living space into what she calls a "shrine," diminishing its aesthetic appeal and making it feel less like a home and more like a museum dedicated to past events or individuals. She recounts her own experience as a newlywed, decorating her first apartment with an abundance of wedding photos due to budget constraints, which she later recognized as a "shrine" to their wedding day. This "shrine" phenomenon, according to Weiler, can also occur with baby photos or pictures of grandchildren, where one subject dominates the visual landscape of a room. Weiler's main advice for homeowners is to diversify their wall decor. Instead of having family photos on every wall, she recommends mixing them with other elements such as mirrors, art prints from platforms like Etsy, or original artwork from local artists or even the homeowners themselves. This approach helps to break up the visual monotony and create a more balanced and dynamic space. Additionally, she offers a practical tip for improving the presentation of existing family prints: using different, matching mats within frames. She suggests purchasing frames from any retailer but investing in quality mats from sources like Etsy to give the display a more cohesive and polished look. The interior designer's views, shared on TikTok, elicited strong reactions from viewers, particularly parents. Many commenters expressed disagreement, asserting that their homes are primarily for their own comfort and enjoyment, not for impressing guests. Common sentiments included preferences for displaying pictures of their children and family life over generic art prints, and stories of how visible family photos made a house feel more like a "HOME." One commenter shared a negative experience of growing up in a home devoid of family photos, feeling that her mother prioritized material aesthetics over personal connection. Conversely, some viewers echoed Weiler's perspective, finding an excessive display of personal photos somewhat narcissistic or overly intimate for communal spaces. In response to the feedback, Weiler posted a follow-up video to clarify her stance. She affirmed that she is a parent herself, hangs personal photos, displays her children's artwork, and utilizes gallery walls in her own home. Her intention was not to discourage family photos altogether but to encourage a more thoughtful and balanced approach to home decoration. She urged her audience to maintain an open mind toward new design ideas, emphasizing that personal preference ultimately dictates how one chooses to decorate their living space, including whether to embrace or eschew the "shrine" concept. The discussion highlights the personal and emotional aspects intertwined with home decor choices, especially when it comes to family mementos. #InteriorDesign #HomeDecor #FamilyPhotos #TikTokTrends #DecoratingTips #PersonalStyle #ParentingPerspectives

This article delves into the final episode of Season 3 of Netflix's 'Dream Home Makeover,' focusing on the transformation of Briana and Josh's open-concept entry, living, and dining spaces. The project presented unique challenges in making the interconnected areas feel distinct yet cohesive. The family's story is highlighted as a poignant motivation behind creating a cherished home environment. The article features insights from Shea McGee, who discusses the design solutions implemented to overcome these challenges and deliver a bright, welcoming space for the resilient family. In the entryway, the design team replaced existing porcelain tile with a tumbled stone herringbone floor. The wall space was strategically utilized to create a visually engaging greeting area. The design philosophy aimed to balance connectivity and separation within the open layout. The existing dark wood beams and floors were retained to provide a contrasting element against refreshed, lighter wall colors. This interplay of light and dark tones, combined with the introduction of antiques and textiles, infused the space with a complementary character and warmth. A significant aspect of this remodel focused on defining the living room's purpose. The objective was to merge the formality of a traditional living space with the functionality and comfort required for a kid-friendly play area. This was achieved through careful selection of furnishings, including curved furniture pieces that soften the room's edges and a large area rug that anchors the space and adds a tactile element. The bay window area was thoughtfully decorated to enhance its inviting appeal, and the expansive back wall was utilized practically to maximize its potential. Artwork played a crucial role in the overall design, given the scale of the walls and the necessity of maintaining visual cohesion across the interconnected spaces. The designers incorporated a diverse range of artistic mediums, such as sketches, photography, and paintings. This variety was unified by adhering to a consistent core color palette throughout the rooms, ensuring that each piece contributed to a harmonious aesthetic while adding individual interest. The article concludes by encouraging readers to explore additional design insights and tips from the season, emphasizing that the inspiration provided by these projects is intended to foster continued creativity in home design. Partner products used in the renovation are also listed, including countertops from Ann Sacks, paint labor by Buehner Brothers Painting, a rounded chair from Interior Define, paint from Clare Paint, floor installation by Mountain West Interiors, a sliding patio door from Pella, decor items from Target, window treatments by The Shade Store, and lighting from Visual Comfort & Co. The overarching goal was to create a home that is both beautiful and deeply meaningful for the family. #Netflix #DreamHomeMakeover #LivingRoomDesign #OpenConcept #InteriorDesign #HomeRenovation #DesignChallenges #ArtworkSelection #StudioMcGee